Words Cannot Describe...

Thanks to Adoro Te Devote (who originally stole it from Crescat) for tonight's little merchandising monstrosity. What is it about my blog that appeals to Catholic sensibilities anyway?

Apparently someone read about my fictional JesuSeat and decided to start producing prototypes. I'm wondering if I should sue them for copyright infringement.


I can only guess that the beloved disciple, John by tradition, was the inspiration behind this thing. In case you don't remember your Bible:

John 13:23 - There was reclining on Jesus' bosom one of His disciples, whom Jesus loved.

As weird as that is to begin with, who'd have thought they'd carry it out in such a creepy way. Who would buy a chair in the likeness of the mythical European Jesus? Anthropomorphic chair collectors? Torture device aficionados?

What if the chair became possessed and decided to like grab you and hold you down while it walked off with you or something? I mean, it could do it! That chair has feet! Real feet like with toes and everything!

If you find it offensive to think that a chair that looks like Jesus could be possessed, then you have no right to be reading this blog.

Goodnight.

Merchandise Mondays: Eight Miles High

This was supposed to be yesterday's post, but the only thing I had time for at the computer was homework. I'll try and continue to do Christian kitsch posts on Mondays. I found this little gem while trolling a Christian bookstore's website:


I took a few minutes to browse the selected portions, including the table contents. I found what looked to be a few pearls of wisdom.

Selected Table of Contents*

Hoo! (Establishing a Firm Identity in Christ)

Cheep! (Honoring God With Your Finances)

Tootwoo! (Why It Really Is A Sin To Kill A Mockingbird)

Terwit Terwoo! (?????????)

*this is totally made up

Humor-Blogs.com is for the birds.